I decided I would treat myself to something I have not had in a very long time. I feel pretty...oh so pretty
It's feelin' a little weird but it's all good!
Thursday, October 2, 2008
I feel pretty....oh so pretty....
I decided I would treat myself to something I have not had in a very long time. I feel pretty...oh so pretty
It's feelin' a little weird but it's all good!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Long time no blog....
Well, I thought it was time to blog since I haven't blogged in like forever...so; here I go!
First, my first plane trip went pretty good. I don't like the take off or the landing but I do not mind the actual trip. And I do believe I have gotten over my fear of heights. On top of that, graduation went well too. With the exception of the blisters I sustained from the tortuous contraptions I wore, otherwise known as heels; it was a great trip and graduation altogether.
I think that the best part was having two very important people there with me, Mom and Steve. My brother, Jeremy and his wife, Courtney could not go because of money issues as well as having 2, 2 year olds and Courtney being preggers. It would not have been a good thing even it would have been great to have everyone that I love there. Steve really made the plane ride much better for me. He was so great. But for him, thought he didn't complain one time, I know he was wondering what he got himself into. LOL! As tall as he is, the plane ride for him was a little uncomfortable. Not to mention that he had worked the night before we left and we had to leave at 2 in the morning on Thursday. He was tired but as I said, never complained once. I told Mom, chivalry is not dead. He made sure that Mom and I were safe and always the gentleman in every sense of the word. I am so blessed with this man in my life and can only hope that he will always be in my life.
Moving on to life since we have returned from Colorado. I had an interesting night to say the least. Have you ever known someone you love but can't stand at times? I have such a person in my life. While I love her and will do just about anything for her, I sometimes cannot stand her. Take tonight for example. Every Tuesday we attend bible study. Now when I say we, I mean me; her Mom and, herself. Each week we look to take turns in driving because of gas prices and well, it's just common sense. Well, 2 weeks ago; I took my turn and then last week her mom took her turn and drove to bible study but then afterwards, she offered to drive home. I suppose she thought that, that was considered to be her turn. Her mom reminded her that she offered to drive home in her mom's car without a fuss. Now I am not one to make a mountain out of a mole hill but this girl lost her ever lovin mind. She flipped the heck out and started making a HUGE deal about driving to church for bible study. This was after I told her that next week was my week, which was my way of reminding her that this was her week to drive. And you know she knew it. Anyway, the whole way to church she is fumming and driving like a mad woman on a rampage. And then as soon as we got to church her mood changed. She was sweet as pie and had not a care in the world. She drives home as if nothing happend and the whole time all I can do is quietly sit and text Steve. All he could say was, as soon as you get home let me know you are safe...which I did. I still have no idea what that was or what even happend.
Now you are probably thinking, "How can you be friends with this person? Nevermind best friends?" Well, to tell you the whole the truth; I have to some extend separated myself from her as much as I can without causing too much of an issue out of it. I may have to do a little more work in that department...at least from what I saw tonight.
Moving on...
I can't believe that in less than 2 months I am going to be meeting my new nephew, Wyatt. Saturday is the baby shower, so you know I am running around like a one legged man in a butt kicking contest...LOSING! LOL!!! Tomorrow though is my day with Steve. He needs to use my computer and then we are spending the afternoon together because the rest of the week will be crazy crazy busy.
So I think that is all for now. I am pretty much caught up with everything that is and has been going on. Til next time...Peace, Love and, Chicken Grease!!!
First, my first plane trip went pretty good. I don't like the take off or the landing but I do not mind the actual trip. And I do believe I have gotten over my fear of heights. On top of that, graduation went well too. With the exception of the blisters I sustained from the tortuous contraptions I wore, otherwise known as heels; it was a great trip and graduation altogether.
I think that the best part was having two very important people there with me, Mom and Steve. My brother, Jeremy and his wife, Courtney could not go because of money issues as well as having 2, 2 year olds and Courtney being preggers. It would not have been a good thing even it would have been great to have everyone that I love there. Steve really made the plane ride much better for me. He was so great. But for him, thought he didn't complain one time, I know he was wondering what he got himself into. LOL! As tall as he is, the plane ride for him was a little uncomfortable. Not to mention that he had worked the night before we left and we had to leave at 2 in the morning on Thursday. He was tired but as I said, never complained once. I told Mom, chivalry is not dead. He made sure that Mom and I were safe and always the gentleman in every sense of the word. I am so blessed with this man in my life and can only hope that he will always be in my life.
Moving on to life since we have returned from Colorado. I had an interesting night to say the least. Have you ever known someone you love but can't stand at times? I have such a person in my life. While I love her and will do just about anything for her, I sometimes cannot stand her. Take tonight for example. Every Tuesday we attend bible study. Now when I say we, I mean me; her Mom and, herself. Each week we look to take turns in driving because of gas prices and well, it's just common sense. Well, 2 weeks ago; I took my turn and then last week her mom took her turn and drove to bible study but then afterwards, she offered to drive home. I suppose she thought that, that was considered to be her turn. Her mom reminded her that she offered to drive home in her mom's car without a fuss. Now I am not one to make a mountain out of a mole hill but this girl lost her ever lovin mind. She flipped the heck out and started making a HUGE deal about driving to church for bible study. This was after I told her that next week was my week, which was my way of reminding her that this was her week to drive. And you know she knew it. Anyway, the whole way to church she is fumming and driving like a mad woman on a rampage. And then as soon as we got to church her mood changed. She was sweet as pie and had not a care in the world. She drives home as if nothing happend and the whole time all I can do is quietly sit and text Steve. All he could say was, as soon as you get home let me know you are safe...which I did. I still have no idea what that was or what even happend.
Now you are probably thinking, "How can you be friends with this person? Nevermind best friends?" Well, to tell you the whole the truth; I have to some extend separated myself from her as much as I can without causing too much of an issue out of it. I may have to do a little more work in that department...at least from what I saw tonight.
Moving on...
I can't believe that in less than 2 months I am going to be meeting my new nephew, Wyatt. Saturday is the baby shower, so you know I am running around like a one legged man in a butt kicking contest...LOSING! LOL!!! Tomorrow though is my day with Steve. He needs to use my computer and then we are spending the afternoon together because the rest of the week will be crazy crazy busy.
So I think that is all for now. I am pretty much caught up with everything that is and has been going on. Til next time...Peace, Love and, Chicken Grease!!!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
No Sleep
It's nearing 5am on Thursday morning. I should be asleep and I was up until about an hour ago but for some reason I am awake; don't ask me why? So I thought I would blog or something like it.
I am one week away from getting on a plane for the first time ever in my 30 years of living. I am graduating from college with my bachelor's of science in business administration with a concentration in health care management. To the least I am nervous. I am not nervous to graduate. I am nervous about being on a plane. Steve said I could hold his hand, just as long as I don't break his hand. LOL! I told him that I couldn't make any promises but I will try not to.
On that note, I made a decision last week that I have complete peace about. I have decided to not continue on with the master's degree program. Even with the grant they would be giving me, it wouldn't be worth it monetary wise. They would have only given me $2,000 in grant money and I would then in turn have to pay back $15,000; of which I do not have and do not wish to owe at this time. Now I know that I could work and do the program but I cannot get the thought of paying that much money back versus the money that I was going to get. It's a bit of a disappointment but at the same time as my sis in law said, I wasn't planning on doing the master's program so it's not like I am going to be completely disappointed.
So now with that decision made, I am in search of a job in my field of study. I am praying and believing God will provide that job to me sooner rather than later. With that said, I can already feel God at work. I just need to get on the ball with Him in this journey. I am planning on this once I get back from Colorado. With everything behind me, I know I will not be waiting too long for a good paying, great bennies and, hours job.
On to something else. I have been thinking about this situation that I find myself in from Sunday. Mom says I should speak with the person. But in all honesty, I know that talking to them would make no difference because they are who they are and the only being that can change them is God Himself. I say that because I have tried to speak with this person before about a different situation that they put me in and it did not do much good. So, I pretty much have decided that I am going to leave this person alone about this situation and try to move on and while I do that; I will pray for her. It's all I can do, right?
Well, I am going to try and lay back down again. I am feeling tired, so maybe I will have some luck in sleeping through the rest of the morning.
I am one week away from getting on a plane for the first time ever in my 30 years of living. I am graduating from college with my bachelor's of science in business administration with a concentration in health care management. To the least I am nervous. I am not nervous to graduate. I am nervous about being on a plane. Steve said I could hold his hand, just as long as I don't break his hand. LOL! I told him that I couldn't make any promises but I will try not to.
On that note, I made a decision last week that I have complete peace about. I have decided to not continue on with the master's degree program. Even with the grant they would be giving me, it wouldn't be worth it monetary wise. They would have only given me $2,000 in grant money and I would then in turn have to pay back $15,000; of which I do not have and do not wish to owe at this time. Now I know that I could work and do the program but I cannot get the thought of paying that much money back versus the money that I was going to get. It's a bit of a disappointment but at the same time as my sis in law said, I wasn't planning on doing the master's program so it's not like I am going to be completely disappointed.
So now with that decision made, I am in search of a job in my field of study. I am praying and believing God will provide that job to me sooner rather than later. With that said, I can already feel God at work. I just need to get on the ball with Him in this journey. I am planning on this once I get back from Colorado. With everything behind me, I know I will not be waiting too long for a good paying, great bennies and, hours job.
On to something else. I have been thinking about this situation that I find myself in from Sunday. Mom says I should speak with the person. But in all honesty, I know that talking to them would make no difference because they are who they are and the only being that can change them is God Himself. I say that because I have tried to speak with this person before about a different situation that they put me in and it did not do much good. So, I pretty much have decided that I am going to leave this person alone about this situation and try to move on and while I do that; I will pray for her. It's all I can do, right?
Well, I am going to try and lay back down again. I am feeling tired, so maybe I will have some luck in sleeping through the rest of the morning.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Friendship
I find this word hard to think about. I am not even sure what it means anymore. You see something was said about me behind my back by someone I never thought would ever say something negative like what she said. And on top of that, when something great happened to me yesterday, this person didn't even clap for me.
I have always been there for this person and always celebrated even the smallest feat for this person. I don't get it and I am not even sure how to deal with it.
I have always been there for this person and always celebrated even the smallest feat for this person. I don't get it and I am not even sure how to deal with it.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
This is for April
7 Things I Want To Do Before I Die...
1. Have a job in a medical environment with amazing benefits that can only come from God
2. Bring at least 1 person to Christ
3. Meet a man who is completely God's gift to me (I know you must be thinking what happened to Steve? He is still in the picture but at the moment the picture is getting blurry)
4. Have at least 1 child of my own
5. Be able to give my Mom back at least half of all she has given to me
6. Give a large amount of money to someone who is in great need and then tell them to pay it forward (yes, I know it comes from the movie but if ya saw the movie you would agree that it is something everyone should want to do)
7. Be free financially
7 Things I Can Do...
1. Be a good Aunt to Ava, Cole and, in 3 months Wyatt
2. Bake
3. Be there for my family and friends when in need
4. Sleep (I most definitely can do that too!)
5. Create (I do this good too...it relaxes me)
6. Gain better perspectives from other people about topics of discussions that I do not understand
7. Being fun
7 Things I Can Not Do...
1. Sing very well...I'm not great but I'm not bad either
2. Stop overthinking....this is a major habit of mine
3. More crafty things...limited space
4. Be mean...I can be but I cannot be mean on purpose
5. Make someone feel ignored
6. Wait for certain people...I get impatient...but I am working on it
7. Be without my family and friends
7 Things That Attracted Me To My Hubby...(Not married but I will answer these about the man God has for me...whether it is Steve or someone else)
1. His kindness (although lately, I have been feeling ignored)
2. His ability to make people feel good
3. I can trust him
4. His desire to better himself
5. I can see a future with him (Not sure if he sees it though)
6. His ability to fix anything
7. He has shown me my self worth
7 Things I Say Most Often
1. I lub you
2. Whatever
3. Don't know, don't care
4. God Bless America (my nice version of saying the God *beep* it) I don't like the GD word at all!
5. Moron!
6. UM! HELLO!!! (This is usually said when I am driving and someone decides to be stupid and cut me off or whatever)
7. CRAP!
7 Celebrity Crushes...(Not sure if I have 7 but I will try)
1. Joey McIntyre (Yes, I know...New Kids On The Block...but he is still HAWT)
2. Paul Walker (The Fast and The Furious, Joy Ride)
3. Clint Eastwood (He is old I know but he is still nice to look at)
4.
5.
6.
7.
According to my instructions, I am now supposed to tag 7 friends. I don't know 7 people on here and the one that I do know, already did this.
1. Have a job in a medical environment with amazing benefits that can only come from God
2. Bring at least 1 person to Christ
3. Meet a man who is completely God's gift to me (I know you must be thinking what happened to Steve? He is still in the picture but at the moment the picture is getting blurry)
4. Have at least 1 child of my own
5. Be able to give my Mom back at least half of all she has given to me
6. Give a large amount of money to someone who is in great need and then tell them to pay it forward (yes, I know it comes from the movie but if ya saw the movie you would agree that it is something everyone should want to do)
7. Be free financially
7 Things I Can Do...
1. Be a good Aunt to Ava, Cole and, in 3 months Wyatt
2. Bake
3. Be there for my family and friends when in need
4. Sleep (I most definitely can do that too!)
5. Create (I do this good too...it relaxes me)
6. Gain better perspectives from other people about topics of discussions that I do not understand
7. Being fun
7 Things I Can Not Do...
1. Sing very well...I'm not great but I'm not bad either
2. Stop overthinking....this is a major habit of mine
3. More crafty things...limited space
4. Be mean...I can be but I cannot be mean on purpose
5. Make someone feel ignored
6. Wait for certain people...I get impatient...but I am working on it
7. Be without my family and friends
7 Things That Attracted Me To My Hubby...(Not married but I will answer these about the man God has for me...whether it is Steve or someone else)
1. His kindness (although lately, I have been feeling ignored)
2. His ability to make people feel good
3. I can trust him
4. His desire to better himself
5. I can see a future with him (Not sure if he sees it though)
6. His ability to fix anything
7. He has shown me my self worth
7 Things I Say Most Often
1. I lub you
2. Whatever
3. Don't know, don't care
4. God Bless America (my nice version of saying the God *beep* it) I don't like the GD word at all!
5. Moron!
6. UM! HELLO!!! (This is usually said when I am driving and someone decides to be stupid and cut me off or whatever)
7. CRAP!
7 Celebrity Crushes...(Not sure if I have 7 but I will try)
1. Joey McIntyre (Yes, I know...New Kids On The Block...but he is still HAWT)
2. Paul Walker (The Fast and The Furious, Joy Ride)
3. Clint Eastwood (He is old I know but he is still nice to look at)
4.
5.
6.
7.
According to my instructions, I am now supposed to tag 7 friends. I don't know 7 people on here and the one that I do know, already did this.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
The Untitled Blog
I'm feelin' kinda lost. While things with Steve are progressing, I can't help but wonder; will we make it? Lately he has been crazy busy with working 2 jobs, one of which is not stable in so far as having a consistent schedule and the other is just plain and simple crazy hours. On top of this he is always doing something for someone he knows and/or his family. I try to be as understanding as but to be honest behind closed doors sometimes understanding goes out the window and I become this puddle of mush, i.e. missing him, feeling like a bother if I text him so I don't text him if I can help it and, did I mention missing him? Also I try never to be the selfish type but again, behind closed doors I will think to myself, "It's not fair, I haven't seen him in ex amount of days..." blah, blah, blah.
Now added to this list is knowing that eventually he will be going back to Texas for 2 years to complete his certification as a master machanic. This is where most of the wondering if we will make it comes from.
Earlier this evening, after having dinner with Mom, I stopped by one of his jobs to find out if we were still on for taking care of some car things for his car tomorrow; which I kinda figured we wouldn't be because he is a perfectionist when it comes to cars and he wants to make sure he does a little more work on his car before we do anything else car related outside of him doing certain things for himself. Somehow we got on the topic of him not having anything to eat all day. When I found out why I changed that pretty quickly. Anyway, at one point to prove a point I was trying to make he said something that didn't sit right with me. After going back out to get him taken care of with getting him food, I flat out asked him what he meant.
You see last week he told me that we were dating. We aren't quite boyfriend/girlfriend but we are not just friends. We are still taking things as they come, getting to know who we are individually and together. Then tonight he said something sounded like it was the complete opposite. As it turns out, I just needed to listen closer to understand what he was saying. This is what got me to thinking more about the will we make it stuff.
I know what God brings together only God can take apart, I guess I just feel so unsecure right now because he is not very expressive in his thoughts. Of course, I know men will never be like us women in that department. As my Mom said, "You don't know what he could be thinking or feeling about or for you, Becky. This could be as hard on him emotionally as it is you with not being able to be with you as much as he may want and then having the idea of going back to Texas." She is right, I know she is...I just wish I could know his thoughts and feelings; at least then I would know a little more than I do.
If any of this makes any sense???
Now added to this list is knowing that eventually he will be going back to Texas for 2 years to complete his certification as a master machanic. This is where most of the wondering if we will make it comes from.
Earlier this evening, after having dinner with Mom, I stopped by one of his jobs to find out if we were still on for taking care of some car things for his car tomorrow; which I kinda figured we wouldn't be because he is a perfectionist when it comes to cars and he wants to make sure he does a little more work on his car before we do anything else car related outside of him doing certain things for himself. Somehow we got on the topic of him not having anything to eat all day. When I found out why I changed that pretty quickly. Anyway, at one point to prove a point I was trying to make he said something that didn't sit right with me. After going back out to get him taken care of with getting him food, I flat out asked him what he meant.
You see last week he told me that we were dating. We aren't quite boyfriend/girlfriend but we are not just friends. We are still taking things as they come, getting to know who we are individually and together. Then tonight he said something sounded like it was the complete opposite. As it turns out, I just needed to listen closer to understand what he was saying. This is what got me to thinking more about the will we make it stuff.
I know what God brings together only God can take apart, I guess I just feel so unsecure right now because he is not very expressive in his thoughts. Of course, I know men will never be like us women in that department. As my Mom said, "You don't know what he could be thinking or feeling about or for you, Becky. This could be as hard on him emotionally as it is you with not being able to be with you as much as he may want and then having the idea of going back to Texas." She is right, I know she is...I just wish I could know his thoughts and feelings; at least then I would know a little more than I do.
If any of this makes any sense???
Thursday, August 28, 2008
The "In Between"
Ok, so a few days ago or maybe it's been about a week by now; I went over to spend a little bit of time with my best friend and her fiancee' Mike. It was good for the most part. Now before I say anything more, I want to say that I do love her very much but sometimes she gets on my last ever loving nerve. With that said, I will continue.
As those few of you that read my blogs are aware of I have been seeing this guy I call my friend boy, Steve. Ever since we stated that there is a little more between us than just friendship, Kellie has been asking me if things have changed. Well, the other night when I went over to her house, I told her that Steve and I are not just friends but we are not quite boyfriend and girlfriend. We are dating. She tells me, that there is no in between. Of course instead of getting into anything, I just told her that where Steve and I are is where we are comfortable and we agree that taking things slow and as they come is what is best for us because as we have discovered, he has made the same dating/relationship mistakes as I have and we both want to do things right. Over time we will see if it going to be something more and in the mean time we are putting God first. Besides that, I am still in school and he is going to be going back to Texas some time after Christmas to complete his schooling that he wasn't able to finish a few years ago due to unforeseen issues that brought him back here. In my personal opinion though, I believe that him seeing me get my bachelor's and now moving on to get my master's has lit a fire under his butt to want to make himself a better man and I am all for that.
The one thing that I don't understand and why some people can't respect what Steve and I have. We care about each other, are there for each other as much as possible and, we are on the same page as life together is concerned. I guess maybe some things are better left just not understanding.
As those few of you that read my blogs are aware of I have been seeing this guy I call my friend boy, Steve. Ever since we stated that there is a little more between us than just friendship, Kellie has been asking me if things have changed. Well, the other night when I went over to her house, I told her that Steve and I are not just friends but we are not quite boyfriend and girlfriend. We are dating. She tells me, that there is no in between. Of course instead of getting into anything, I just told her that where Steve and I are is where we are comfortable and we agree that taking things slow and as they come is what is best for us because as we have discovered, he has made the same dating/relationship mistakes as I have and we both want to do things right. Over time we will see if it going to be something more and in the mean time we are putting God first. Besides that, I am still in school and he is going to be going back to Texas some time after Christmas to complete his schooling that he wasn't able to finish a few years ago due to unforeseen issues that brought him back here. In my personal opinion though, I believe that him seeing me get my bachelor's and now moving on to get my master's has lit a fire under his butt to want to make himself a better man and I am all for that.
The one thing that I don't understand and why some people can't respect what Steve and I have. We care about each other, are there for each other as much as possible and, we are on the same page as life together is concerned. I guess maybe some things are better left just not understanding.
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